Wife-beater Stever Steve Leigh Loser Extradinairre
* Your imaginary friends keep finding excuses not to come over. (http://filer.blogbus.com/4718934/resource_4718934_12984336283.bmp
* You're pretend your dog died, when it actually ran away and you post it on a dog board to get sympathy. (See Exhibit B in other words known as Picture B. )
* You try to commit suicide by putting blanks in a gun, firing, fail and wonder why.
* You are over 30 and still living at 15124 North 18th Street. Lutz, FL.
* You are so annoying that even your multiple personalities won't speak to you any more. (http://filer.blogbus.com/4718934/resource_4718934_12984336283.bmp
* You find that your friends consist of an old teddy bear named "Cuddles" and a dead pet goldfish named "Freddy" (with his scales rubbed off from constant petting).
* Your social life consists of your weekly visits to the local shrink and psychologist.
* Your first name is totally unknown to the public because of that incident in 1st grade that dubbed you "Screwy Stewy."
* You are over 18 years of age and still pee in the public pool.
* You look forward to going to a Catholic church for confession just so you can have someone to talk to.
* You're still talking about the one day you played at Stax from 40 years ago.
* You welcome calls from phone salesmen because no one else will talk to you.
* You get fired from you job at Stax for making a pass at a real musician.
* You're a part of the *Steve Leigh* fan club.
* You take a look at your last mug shot and think, "Hey, ... I'm pretty photogenic!"
* Someone tells you to go "jack off" ... so you do.
* You find that after watching one of those commercials with a mom and daughter, you begin to doubt your own freshness.... and you're a GUY.
* You can't wait to watch "Friends" because that's what they are to you.